I spent the first two weeks of March roadtrippin’ across the USA, which you probably already knew if you follow me on Instagram/Facebook/Twitter. From Phoenix to NY, we drove thru 14 states, stopped at countless cities, traveled more than 6,000 miles. We went from desert to snow and everything in between.
It was a business trip for my husband, visiting different customers along the way, and I just happened to tag along because I love road-trips and more importantly because I love my husband. There’s something about being confined to a small space with the one you love for hours on end…we’ve had some of the deepest, most random conversations in a car in the middle of nowhere, which I find incredibly romantic; we’ve witnessed some of the most splendid sunsets and stopped to admire beautiful landscapes; we’ve discovered new wonderful places and visited old favorite ones; we’ve fallen in love with each other, and with this country, all over again.
I got to see some places that had been on my travel bucket list for a long time, like San Antonio, Atlanta, New Orleans and Savannah; and also visited some old familiar places like Austin, Houston, Baltimore and my dear New York City.
I don’t know what it is about travel that makes me feel so accomplished. Maybe it’s because it was a childhood dream to travel the world and explore new horizons, and as many places as I have yet to discover, I am grateful for every single mile I have traveled.
Have you ever had any demons, of which you’re fairly aware of, haunted you for years? You have, right? I mean we all have our own demons we struggle with at some point or another in life, whatever they might be…right? Have you ever for the most part managed to lock them up somewhere deep in the back of your mind achieving a certain state of denial/avoidance/hiding? Have you ever had any of those demons come out of that deep locked up place you put them in and stared you right in the eyes, and no matter how much you try to look away or figure out how to locked them up again, you ultimately feel compelled to finally face them while also feeling incredibly afraid to do so?
That’s exactly where I suddenly and very unexpectedly find myself at the moment, right at the corner of dazed and confused. I won’t go into specific details about my own demons and current circumstances, because, well, they’re deeply personal and private (though I guess not quite as much after this post!); I’m definitely not comfortable sharing that much here on the blog and not sure I ever will. However, lying here in bed alone in the middle of the night, I feel like reaching out in hope that someone out there can relate to what I’m vaguely describing; and maybe, just maybe, even provide some comfort or interesting insight on dealing with this sort of thing, that I wanna believe to a certain extent it’s a universal human experience.
As much as a part of me urges me to find that damn lock again so I can stuff everything back in the back of my mind under an “ignorance (or in this case denial!) is bliss” sign, I know that’s not really what I want. What I want is to be free, because I now realize it wasn’t that I had locked the demons up somewhere, I had just locked them out; unintentionally creating a prison for myself in the process, a prison that seemed like a safe place to hide. But now I want to be free from that prison, I want to be free from those demons. I fear it’ll be a long and painful road to freedom, but I’m almost 30 years old, I’m too old to be playing hide & seek with my issues.
I actually can’t stop wondering why now, after decades of managing somewhat successfully to avoid dealing with these issues, all of the sudden one seemingly insignificant incident has broken all the locks and yanked me out of my hiding place…precisely now, 2 weeks before my 30th birthday. It almost feels like life telling me to grow the f*** up and get over it. Except, is it possible there might be things in life we can’t get over? In the face of certain realities we can’t change, maybe there’s no such thing as getting over them, maybe our only option is to learn to live with them, as painful as they are. And how does one do that? Does it mean learning to live with the pain forever? Or does it come a time when, even in the midst of a painful reality, there’s no pain anymore? Is that the ultimate sign of true healing? I don’t know…all I know is I want to find my way to those answers. I just hope I have the strength to handle them when I do.
I don’t usually use the blog as an outlet to discuss or dissect runway shows and/or their trends, but there was one unexpected item making an appearance on top haute couture runway shows recently that has me really intrigued as to whether or not it would go further than that as a trend.
I don’t know about you guys but as much as I love my beautiful high heels, I actually don’t wear them very often. They can be gorgeous and even flattering, but oh the unnecessary pain they inflict onto us stares right back at me whenever I stand in front of my closet trying to decide on footwear for the day. I confess to having fantasized, more than once and usually after wearing a pair for hours, about living in a world free of high heels; a world where looking presentable doesn’t involve any kind of torture; where comfort meets fashion; where you can look just as fashionably fierce in sneakers as Carrie Bradshaw did in her sky-high heels.
I suspect I’m not the only one who has had some version of this fantasy, and now, guess what? The fashion masters of the universe seem to have decided to cut us (and our tortured feet) some slack and filled their most recent runway shows with sneakers everywhere! The most fashionably looks by the likes of Chanel and Dior were paired not only with sneakers (after all, vans and converse have long been acceptable as a form of fashionable footwear for certain looks), but with very sporty looking ones. We are talking couture gowns paired with a Chanel sparkly version of the athletic sneaker, people! Kind of shocking, isn’t it? It really does take the eye a bit to adjust to the sight of haute couture head to ankle, followed by runner shoes.
Now, here’s what I’m really curious about, finding out your thoughts on this subject…what do you think of this newly proposed trend? Do you predict it will translate to the streets? Will the masses embrace it? Will sneakers become ubiquitous outside of the gym and running trails? Or will it go just as far as the edge of the runway strip? A trend just for the fashion eccentrics of the world? Would you wear a classic Chanel tweed jacket and skirt with your favorite running shoes?
That what do I think you asked? I think it might take some time to get used to the sight of sneakers accompanied of what we considered “dressed up” or serious clothes…but we’ve been dreaming about this day for way too long to let this opportunity pass us by. So yes, I predict somewhere in the not too distant future, even the most appalled judges of this trend will be taking it out for a test run.